Host: “OK, thank you. We’ll call you when your tabl…”

Guest: “How much longer?” (interrupts, leaning in from the side)

Host: “We’ll give you a call when you’re table is ready.” (finishing what she was saying to the guest in front of her and offers a familiar smile of gratitude and assumption that this person wouldn’t do something so rude and takes a sip of water to give herself some time to shake it off and, as a long shot, to also give the interrupter a chance to realize himself, to no success)

Guest: “How much longer?” (steps in closer, still leaning, stiff)

The host puts her cup down, looks at the guest and steadies herself, smiles

Host: “What’s your name?”

Guest: “Sommers”

Host: “Let’s see” (looks up and down one page, then flips back to the previous page and cannot find that name). “Sommers?”

Guest: “Yes” (panic in the voice, posture stiffens to what seems a painful seriousness. “I think we’re on the first page” (he leans in so close, the host could smell his nostril breath and starts running his finger up and down the page)

Host: “Oh, is it Larry?” (she happens to recall this particular interaction, sometimes she is good at remembering, but on a Friday night, she felt pretty good about that one, and well, it’s a good thing, isn’t it?)

Guest: “Yes, yes that’s me, Larry, yeah. How much longer for us?”

Host: “Let’s see, you guys came in right at 8:15. It’s 8:35 now. It’s probably going to be the full hour/hour 15 minutes that I quoted you guys. So, probably around 9:15-9:30” (internally explodes with delight and sweet vindication at the ‘time in’ column on the wait sheet)

Guest: “Oh, really? Hm. OK.” (stands there, stiffer still, dubious now and remains as oblivious to the nine or so newcomers standing in the doorway waiting to get their name in as he was to the guest he interrupted, in the first place)

I believe what you meant was:

Guest: “Sommers.” (when asked your name at the door). “OK, thank you.” (went and waited at the bar until your phone rang)

Ah, there we go. Because:

First of all,

You gave the name, ‘Larry’ and didn’t even remember. So, after interrupting the host while she was talking to someone else, you jumped in front of several others to get your answer, then further wasted the host’s precious time by forgetting that ‘Sommers’ is not what you had her write down. Secondly, it had only been twenty minutes out the hour-hour 15 minutes you were quoted to have to wait. Look around you, sir. Stop and think for a minute (or 60-75 minutes) and realize your situation. There are 175 people in here right now and they all have a name on the list. They’re all waiting. The host is one person having to deal with all of them. You interrupted a conversation, you invaded someone’s personal space, you breathed on someone, you couldn’t even put forth the effort to remember the name you have the host looking for, 45 minutes too early, and you still think something is off? There’s something the host is just, not getting, something you shouldn’t have to be dealing with, waiting for, being made a victim of, well, not you, anyway, not you. Surely, the rules don’t actually pertain to you, too like they do everyone else, surely, that can’t be what we’re implying.

Lastly, considering the nature of your approach, the assumptions made in the following questions/statements are not only fair, but must be true:  How can you take that much time for yourself in that situation to ask the host twice, with space in between the first question and the echo of it moments later, (an unrealized opportunity orchestrated by her to help you see yourself) “how much longer”and not, at any point, realize that you were asking the host to, not only look at your face and automatically remember your name, but remember a name she never actually wrote down, and not only a name she never actually wrote down, but where you were on the list, and not only where you were on the list, but what time you came and in, and therefor, be able to toss an answer back at you as if it were a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question. Then she could simply carry on with her task at hand. ‘Just real quick, throw me my answer and you can get back to what you were doing’. How else would the success of your quest be possible, in the specific way that you set forth to achieve it, if not by these assumptions?

The existence of other people, common curtesy and jobs that you’ve never had to do because they are beneath you are things. Look into them. Doing so might help you become a human being.

*I made up this name. However, this happens more often than I care to remember so there is a chance the name and story could sync, but probably not.